One of the hardest things I had to realise was that becoming an adult did not mean that I would automatically become emotionally stable.
In a way I was looking forward to turning 18 or 20 because I hoped that becoming an adult meant that I would "have it all figured out".
And I am not talking about having a career, a husband and a house.
I was hoping that as an adult I would finally stop feeling like a helpless victim of my emotions.
But that wasn't the case.
Reaching adulthood does not mean that we reach emotional maturity, especially when coming from an emotionally challenged background (and by that I mean growing up in an emotionally and mentally manipulative social environment).
It took me almost a decade to self-teach myself to emotional maturity.
Sometimes it takes multiple decades, sometimes it takes a lifetime.
But it is the most valuable skills we will ever acquire.
What is important for us to understand to get started is that, when we do not grow up surrounded by emotionally mature people, managing our emotions effectively is a skill that we will have to (re-)learn.
This understanding alone elliminates unrealistic expectations and paves the way for compassion towards ourselves and patience towards our own personal development process.